To Laugh in the Face of Another Year

New Year’s Day graced us with a couple rare, golden hours where both of our beautiful boys were napping at the same time. I took the opportunity to crack open my devotional (it was New Year’s Day, after all, and time, once again, to resolve to be more disciplined in my prayer life). The verse I opened to, just by chance, was Proverbs 31:25-

She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. 

I instantly tilted my head and furrowed my brows. 

Though I’d read the passage of the “wife of noble character” many times, and usually come away from it feeling like a total failure, it struck me completely differently today.

Can one laugh at the days to come on New Year’s Day?

Every New Years, including this one, I’ve made resolutions, plans, and checklists, I’ve prayed dearly for change, and I’ve desperately shoved down anxieties for what’s to come. I can’t remember a single New Year’s when I considered the year ahead and laughed at the days to come.

I mean, what’s to laugh at? The past several years have been filled with chaos, disease, division, hatred, violence, heartache, separation, fear, and failure for almost all of us. Why should this year be any different? Why should this year be worth the effort of expecting answered prayers when so many years have passed without? Then it struck me that it does not matter if the year is better or worse than the one before. What matters is the perspective required to laugh at the days to come. It’s one that demands a holy, heavenly footing. One that can only come from detaching ourselves from both the desires and the crisis of right now, and choosing to be nestled within the arms of the Lord. One that looks at both the high and low tides of life and says, as Lady Julian of Norwich once did, “All shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well.”

It is so not in keeping with my personality to let go of all the things I want to accomplish and just sit at His feet. I don’t rest well. I don’t sit for long. I crave action and activity. Busyness: a curse word in the heavenly realms, I think. But what if the year of the Lord’s favor is defined by every hour that we spend in His presence? Pastor Jim implored us on Sunday to set boundaries on how we spend our time and attention. It reminds me of something my husband said as we talked about the seeming impossibility of ever buying a house. He said, “it’s not about looking at our budget and the market anymore. It’s about just praying and pursuing God. That’s the new dream.” 

So what if we entirely let go of both our hopes and horrors? Dreams and disasters? Failures and fears? What if we packed it all up, dumped it all into His open palms, and traded it for a life lived in the presence of God every day, and let the rest fall into its place (or not) as He wills? 

Is that worth a laugh? Or at least a shrug and a chuckle? 

I’m not sure, because I’ve never tried. But now I long to lean back against Him and survey the year ahead with a twinkle in my eye and a laughing smile on my lips. 

Here’s the resolution: 

Give up your hopes and dreams and walk with Him.

Here’s the resolution:

Give up your fear and despair and walk with Him.

Here’s the resolution: 

Just walk with Him. 

I’ll let you know how it goes. And if you want to try it with me, I’ll be praying for you too. Let’s laugh together. Because He is, and He is good.